Getting through the day, one cup at a time.


Have you ever been so shocked and happy about something that you just plain forget English and start driveling all over the house. That happened to me, just under an hour ago.

I had just put the kids down and sat down at my computer to prepare myself for another night of “estudio muchas Espanol” for school when I decided to check my email (boring blather), and then clicked on my bookmark for my OSAP application. OSAP, for those who don’t know, is the student financial assistance program here in Ontario. In other words, it’s where the money comes from these days. I sighed as I clicked on through and distinctly remember thinking (or saying out loud…shhhh) “Why do I do this to myself? Torture myself like this.”

Why would I say something so negative? Well, because OSAP and I ran into a little hiccup recently. Due to my full-time status, but my only 60% course load, my upcoming second calendar year is still only considered my first academic year by my school. OSAP saw YEAR ONE on a piece of paper, assumed I had failed at my first year, and was all “we ain’t gonna pay you if you’s a stoopid fail head. Wassup wid dis year one bs? You best be explainin’, son”.

I had to write a very detailed letter explaining that although my paperwork said year one, it was only because I am taking 60% of my course load each year, which means my courses for my second calendar year are still considered “first year courses”. I then snail mailed it to OSAP, and proceeded to wait impatiently. Now, the post around here is awesome. The speed at which OSAP processes the paperwork that they receive is much, much slower than my anxiety allows.

So, “Why do I do this to myself? Torture myself like this.”

And then the request for this letter was gone.

And my funding has been approved.


jump for joy

This is fabulous news because we recently found out that we’re expecting our third. Surprise!


Hey, Look Who’s Awesome

It’s Melanie from motherofnine9 who decided to tell me that I was awesome.


Which is amazing really, because instead of “awesome” I’ve been “absent”.


I’ll take it though. Who doesn’t like a virtual high-five?

BecauseURFantabulous      AwesomeBlossom













Out Of My Head And Into The Blog

And then it won’t be in my head anymore, right?

I hope so.

I start school in January. I’m going to be receiving funding from the province, of which I will have to pay back a portion at the end of my schooling. It’s….tight. Now, I’ve always been used to living tight but this is really tight. Fiscally, that is.

I know that I have tons of things to be grateful for, and I am, I’m just worried. I’m worried that I’m going to have to magically come up with some money to buy the last 3 toddler gifts that I need to purchase. I’m worried that there isn’t money coming in January (I’m on my own until February) and although I have budgeted madly, I’m still worried that I will have forgotten something. Or that something unexpected will come up.

Do you know what I did today? I researched drug and dental coverage plans for my little family. For the two girls and I, everything – every single company – the monthly premium was over $100. As an alternative to that (since I live in Canada and severe medical emergencies are covered by the government) I have created a slush fund in my tight-belted budget that should cover the occasional prescriptions. I hope.

Since when did it become okay for me to start pitying myself again? To start feeling bad that I can’t afford to register the girls in any extra curricular programs this winter. Or maybe even summer. I know we’re going to be fine. That we’ll make it out on the other end all covered in sunshine and rainbows, and stronger for it. But I’m just worried at this point.

I’ll probably feel better in February but I just wanted to vent.


*exploding head from here*


*insert maniacal grin here*




Well hello loud knocking on the door, what is this?

Whatever could that be?

IT’S MY MONSTER! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don’t know if you guys remember or not, but I won a contest over at F-Words for being the coolest person ever or something like that AND SHE MADE ME A MONSTER!!!

It’s okay to be jealous. Part of me is jealous of the other part of me right now.

Kira’s first question was “I hug it?” and I said yes, provided she would say cheese.

So then I set my camera to take pictures by itself and landed with this bad boy. The monster is as big as my kid! It has super awesome colours AND the top is made to look like the steam from my coffee cup. Because I’m coffeepowered. Duh. His eyes are also massive because he’s enjoying his caffeine high right now. Alternatively, it’s because he just woke up and needs his coffee.

Look! Java Monster is writing the next CPM post!

I tried to get him to hold my favourite mug but it was too heavy, so he has to use ye olde plastic travelling mug. I think he’ll survive.

Oh look! Now the kids have gone to bed!

This is super awesome and like any good mom, I’m going to keep it allllll to myself. It’s mine. Don’t touch.

I’m halfway inspired to try and make little stuffed critters for my own children. Mainly so they don’t touch mine.


I don’t know if she’s making these to order, but if you want to bug her and find out – or mainly if you want to read a really really good blog – head over to F-Words right now! Todah! Pronto!

I am also working on a name for this little dude, I’m about 80% of the way to Java Monster but I will accept other ideas in the comment section below. Something coffee-y and creative. And yes, he’s a he. Doesn’t all the pink make it obvious?


My little dude also came with a letter that said something about us being awesome and the same person, how we both have kids, and a blog, and love Christmas…….hmmmm……..and I think it said that she wanted to be my best friend forever and that she hoped that I would send her a Christmas card. Seriously. I’m going to send her a Christmas card. I’ll probably leave out the obnoxious photo of my children though. She can see enough of those on here!


If you don’t want a Christmas card you should probably let me know….


Blog Tag

If this was a real game of tag, I would be the fat kid left at the bottom of the flight of stairs. Panting.

Grandmalin at Breathing Space tagged me to play Blog Tag on July 17. I’ll let that sink in. So here I am, almost two months later, finally trying to take a crack at it. Being less lazy at cleaning makes me epically lazy at blogging. Sheesh.

THANK YOU GRANDMALIN!!! It was very nice of you to tag me, and I really do appreciate it – even if I’m super lazy and you may have thought that I forgot or decided not to do it. This is a lot of work, after all… huzzah!!!

The rules for playing blog tag are….

  • You must post the rules
  • Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post
  • Create eleven new questions to ask the people you’ve tagged (or use the existing ones)
  • Tag (eleven) people with a link to your post
  • Let them know they’ve been tagged

HOKAI! Here are the questions that I’ve been given:

1.  When is the last time you did something for the first time? Hermmmmmmm…….well, for Phil’s birthday we went to Wonderland and I rode Leviathan for the first time, alternatively I put my arms UP on several roller coasters for the first time. That would have been one month ago.

2.  What would your life be incomplete without? My family! If I had to choose a material possession I would sayyyyyyyy my camera. Or coffee. Probably my camera though.

3. What is your greatest fear? Dying. Leaving my kids because I’ve died and then having them deal with the ensuing mess. Maybe even having them live in different houses after my death.

4.  What makes you smile or laugh out loud? Phil. And when my kids try to be funny, or are funny accidentally.

5.  What’s your worst habit, and what are you doing to change it? My worst habit has been having angry outbursts. I have had to try to relearn how to deal with my anger so that I can teach my children to deal with their anger appropriately.

6.  Who (or what) is your best friend? Aunt Jodi is my bestest friend ever and we didn’t even like each other six years ago. Phil is also my best friend, but I named him second because his main title is “boyfriend”.

7.  What makes you sad (or mad) enough to cry (or punch somebody)? Sad enough to cry? Pretty much anything that shows a parent losing their child or a child being exceptionally amazing at life. Mad enough to punch somebody? Liars.

8.  If you owned a boat, what would you name it? Ally says she’d name her boat “Cana”. The spelling is improvised by me. Kira says she’d name her boat “Lifejacket”. I guess I’d have to name my boat “Cana Lifejacket” and I would require that everyone aboard wore lifejackets. It doesn’t matter how well you can swim if you’re unconscious…

9.  What’s your proudest accomplishment? Other than raising my kids? Ermmmm enrolling in school.

10.  What did you want to be when you grew up and how did that work our for you? A mom! And it’s going pretty well, thanks. My back up plan was to be a teacher, and I’m beginning that journey as well.

11.  If you were making a movie about your life, what actors would you chose to play yourself and your significant other(s)? A movie about my life. Hmmm. I’m not too versed in all of the actorly people out there… I would want to be played by Jennifer Garner. I think she’s could capture me being happy and silly, as well as be able to produce the darker more painful sides of my life.

I guess I would cast Ryan Reynolds to play Phil because he’s versatile enough to show Phil’s softer mushy side while still capturing his sense of humour and intense passion.

(Question number 12 is Do you hate me for tagging you?  but you can skip that one if you think I won’t like the answer.) No, I don’t. I’m flattered. 😀


I’m going to tag eleven people before I write my eleven questions. Here are the people who I TAG to play Blog Tag.

Psst….you’re it!

  1. sillyliss
  2. wifemothereventplanner
  3. Jestidwell’s Blog
  4. Fine Frugality
  5. Pa-BLAM
  6. Don’t Forget to Feed the Baby
  7. themotherofnine
  8. The High Need Baby Blog
  9. no time for ironing
  10. bobthemartian
  11. Perfectly imperfect momma

And now, my lovely and participational friends, my questions for you:

  1. I’m not big on having regrets. What was your biggest regret and why do you think that it helped you to get where you are today? After all, if you had changed it, something else about you would have changed.
  2. Where is your favourite place to be?
  3. How much money do you spend on groceries every month?
  4. Is there an errand that you hate running with a particular vengeance?
  5. Have you ever had surgery? And for what?
  6. What day is garbage day?
  7. Are your parents married? Divorced? Married to other people?
  8. Fill in the blanks. I think people are ___________ when they ___________.
  9. Do you have a recurring dream? About what?
  10. Have you started your Christmas (or other winter holiday) shopping?
  11. Do you have a particular trait, characteristic, etc. that you do NOT want to pass on to your kids?

There we are. Musings from my twisted mind. Huzzah!