Getting through the day, one cup at a time.

DIY Tree Stand Holder – Because doing it yourself is ALWAYS a good idea…

on November 27, 2012

“Hey Phil, you know what I hated last year? Having to reach under the tree to get presents and getting stabbed because I neglected to water it enough. I want to raise the tree stand this year, about a foot off the ground; then we can get a smaller tree and not get stabbed as often.”

-Me, about a month ago.

Then I had a freaking brilliant idea. I would make the tree stand holding device out of leftover scraps from our renovations last year. Ka-win. Right?

Step One: Borrow a skilsaw from your dad because they cost a lot of money, and since you only use one once every other year or so it doesn’t seem like a sound investment.

Step Two: Set up a makeshift shop in your basement. Use ridiculous items for horses, such as your children’s old toy box. And a weird ladder thing. Comb through your scrap pile and choose your materials. Pick wood that is at least as wide as you would like your stand holder to be tall, and long enough to surpass the width of your tree stand four times.

Oh look, I found two convenient pieces of particle board. They were both over 10 inches wide, and since my tree stand is 14″ (inches) wide – their lengths of 37″ and 35″ totalled more than four times the stand width. (14″x 4 = 56″.Β  37″+ 35″ = 72″.Β  72″ > 56″) Also, choose a nice sturdy piece of plywood that is large enough to cover the entire top of the box you will create (Largest possible square from the plywood: 20″x 20″).


Step Three: Measure twice, cut once. After your first cut, realize that you are shaking like a small child and that it has been far too long since you have operated a skilsaw. Also, fail a little at the cut and repeat it in order to actually succeed at cutting off all the material that needs to be removed. Sigh.

Continue cutting and think to yourself how much the guys from your Carpentry Apprenticeship program would laugh if they could see you now. Cut two of your pieces, “sides” if you will, shorter than the other two but only by the amount of the width of the wood. (The pieces of particle board were 3/4″s thick, so the smaller sides needed to be 3/4″s shorter.) Realize as you stand the pieces side by side that duh, the shorter sides need to be twice the width shorter, so 1 1/2″ shorter instead of 3/4″.

If you’re following me, then congratulations! You must have been a carpenter in a past life!

Step Four: Assemble the sides of your box. *cough* Assemble….assemble the…….argh! Why do these screws hate me so much?!?! Ouch! Screws get really really hot if you suck as hard as I did at screwing through the longer ‘side’ into the shorter ‘side’. Your middle finger pad may blister later, but it’s okay. Walk it off, you’re in the construction business now.

Miss. Miss. Miss…….gawd I suck at this. Continue to mentally degrade yourself as you continue to be unable to successfully place two consecutive screws. Begin to lose hope that this will ever look nice and/or function. Remind yourself that it will be covered by your epic tree skirt so no one will see it anyways. Those judgmental wieners…….

Step Five: Screw the top of your tree stand holder on to the base. That’s right. More screws. Feel free to curse, mutter, glare, etc. Does your back hurt from all of this hard labour yet? Mine sure does. I never want to stand again.

Did you miss your screws again? Perhaps drop another one? Make that GZZZZZZRRZT noise with your drill? It’s all good, I’m fairly certain it’s all part of the project.

Step Six: Swear off projects involving a saw. For serious. Free or not. Maybe this will seem like a better idea when my back stops hurting, and my finger blister heals, but until that point: don’t do this project. Just buy something. Anything. Or leave your tree stand on the ground like a normal person. What’s the matter with you? Always have to be different? Special you, eh?

Aw, who am I kidding. I haven’t even been done an hour and I’m already starting to feel proud of myself. It will be a looooooooooong time before I ask to borrow my dad’s skilsaw again though. I’m going to stick to the “scissors and glue” kinds of crafting for a while.


7 responses to “DIY Tree Stand Holder – Because doing it yourself is ALWAYS a good idea…

  1. sillyliss says:

    Color me impressed!

  2. You can cook, sew and do woodwork?? Marry me! Just don’t tell my husband and kids.

  3. I’m really really impressed. I totally wouldn’t have undertaken this. I might have gotten the vision for it, but then made someone else do it for me. You’re the woman!

    • Why, thank you! πŸ™‚ It wasn’t too overwhelming for me because my dad is a master carpenter (so I grew up around it) and after high school I did take my year one Carpentry Apprenticeship before having my babies. I actually felt less successful during the process because I used to be sooooooo good at woodworking. πŸ˜€

  4. Love it! You’re a rock star! πŸ™‚

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